Put Your Money Where Your Mojo Is

Oh, lordie.

Why is it that, even though we have lots of good astrological data on the presidential hopefuls, no one will just get down and dirty with the data and forecast for The Day? I mean, someone who wins an election is going to have "Woo! I just won an election!" transits. It's really pretty simple. My own experience is that, since I've been studying astrology, I've been able to predict every single winner -- and then some.

The best example of this is the 2000 election. About two or three days before the election, I was at work looking at the charts of Gore and Bush during lunch, and I discovered they had no definitive transits on the day after the election. I also noted that Mercury went retrograde the day of the election. I mentioned this to a mildly interested co-worker. I asked him, "Is there any reason the election results would be delayed?" He couldn't think of any.

Of course, the day after the election, he came to work, slammed down his backpack on his desk, pointed at me and shouted "SPOOKY!" in front of the whole office.

Heh.

Later while everyone was counting hanging chads and the nation was in the balance, I did a simple forecast for the next couple of months, specifically for January 20th -- Inaugural Day. Because it stands to reason that on that day either Gore or Shrub would have "Woo! I'm giving my Inaugural Day speech!" transits. I mean, am I right or am I right?

Astrologers are pussies if they are not doing this publically at least as an exercise. They bitch and moan that "No one would have believed me if I saw 9/11 coming." Well, that's because your pansy Asstrolabe tush is sitting there running "past life" readings based on the South Node of someone's goddamn moon. WHO CARES? Flex that prognostication muscle a bit, won't ya?

This time around, it's mostly only Democratic candidates who have even reasonably reliable astrological data -- probably because not since Nancy Reagan have any of the NeoCons wanted to get their grimy hands in anything akin to this evil child-raping practice known as astrology. Fine. Your candidates are WEAK BEER anyway.

Let's start with Hillary and Obama:

If -- and I mean really IF -- we have correct birth times for both Hillary and Obama, then it appears Obama has only one transit the day after the election -- Jupiter sextile the ASC in the third. It's a positive one, bringing him a great deal more contact with the public, but NOT a "Hey, I just won an election" transit. That makes me suspect that ultimately he's not going to run, or that he's going to play a different role than we currently think.

But Hillary...dear, dear Hillary...all I can say is, it's gonna suck to be her that day.

There are three major transits. If we went with just one of them -- Pluto entering her 7th house -- we might think she'd just entered the public sphere with power. Then again, it could bring a destruction and rebuilding of partnerships, or a new, extremely powerful partnership. It's a very big, awesome, steamroller kind of transit. However, I'm not convinced that 8:00pm sharp is her exact birth time. Whenever I hear an exact hour like that, I suspect someone is estimating or rounding off unless there's a birth certificate I can see. Therefore, I would not even say with certainty this transit is happening for her then, as the 7th house cusp placement, like the ascendant, is highly sensitive to the minute. If she's actually born at 8:06 or 7:55, for example, this transit won't be happening at precisely that time.

Yet she has two other gawd-awful, terrible transits that day. The first and worst is transiting Neptune opposing Saturn. People with this transit typically suffer a horrendous bout of guilt over a failed project or some other tragedy where they blame themselves for what happened. She'll actually get her first taste of this transit in the second half of June. I suspect legal issues, as it's the 3rd and 9th houses, but that would hardly be anything new, would it? The twist is that it's also going to challenge the way she thinks and communicates in general. Maybe she'll even withdraw from the press. Crazy, but it could happen.

The third transit, however, is a doozy -- transiting Pluto square her natal Moon. A power struggle transit of the first order. In order to handle this emotionally challenging transit, she's going to have to retreat into her family and home. (At least to take the edge off the t-square.) Maybe Hillary isn't someone I should feel sorry for, but I do. She's in for some huge emotional confrontations. (And Bill, for what it's worth, has a bizarre sort of spiritual revolution transit at that time, with a relationship surprise. Not bad necessarily, just whacky to be having the day after your wife's major failure. Way to go, Bill!)

Now let's talk about Edwards.

Edwards so far has the strongest transits out of everyone. BUT he has transiting Saturn squaring his natal Sun. This strong "challenge to authority" transit at that time that doesn't necessarily bode well, nor does he have anything that shows him gaining power. (A month or so prior to that, he does have that "steamroller" transit I describe for Hillary. I doubt it's related.)

BUT.

If you run his progressions, you'll find big ol' fat progressed Joop sitting on his natal Gemini SUN. Yes, his SUN. Wow! ("Yes, hello, why I am the King of the World. Why do you ask?")

Thing is, Edwards is behind Hillary and Obama in the polls and on Fark they're calling him a douche bag. He did do very well in Iowa recently, which might mean something. Right now, the stars are not aligning with the outer world. It's going to be interesting to see what happens...